A. Malcolm – How we saw it.

I am just one of 340 local ABOotlanders.  The brilliant thing about that is being able to hear, feel, see & understand how others interpret, percieve & process each episode of Outlander.

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No surprise that A. Malcolm is one of those episodes that has a great divide in the interpretation.  Why?  Likely because it also had the most expectation.  When we imagine things, we detail them, connect emotion to them to make them real.  It is a natural way to process.  Many of us have not only read the “reuinon” of  Jamie & Claire an insane amount of times, we have layered it with our emotions which ultimately solidifies our images so we can “feel” what we are imagining.   Visions of each moment were exeedingly clear.

There is no right, there is no wrong. There is no reason to change someones mind about what they saw but perhaps there is a reason to understand they are as entitled to seeing something their way as we are, ours.

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We should never feel the need to defend our feelings nor feel sorry we have them. Just as we shouldn’t assume others are missing something or blind to disappointment.  The most important thing to remember is opinion & fact are 2 different beasts. Where personal interpretation exists, just like jello, fact isn’t something that is “nail downable”.

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On our local FB group we have episode discussions – we have this thing about saying what we mean, without being mean & respecting one anothers view points.  It makes having discussions so much more enjoyable when coming from a place of assuming positive intent.

It’s a study of personalities & experiences when we truly listen to how others digest visuals.  It can be facinating –  if we let it engage us & not separate us.

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Here are moments the ABOotlanders pointed out as group favourites:

  1.  Jamies view of the day.  Being reminded that Claire had a lot of planning, thinking, hoping going on and this… it was all a true smack upside the head.  Never in a million years…ok…200 years did he see this coming. Watching that shock play out from the place he was living was pretty cool.
  2.   Jello. Bicycles. Zippers. Photos. There was an excitement about the mention of things Jamie has no idea about. That connection from past to future. It almost is a full circle kind of feeling that was a unified “loved it”.
  3.  Grown up Fergus.  I admit, this tiny little scene made me sobgasp.  That took me by complete surprise.  The ABOotlanders were unanamous of their Fergus love and the gravity of that moment.
  4.  Wee Ian.  For book readers, we know what this young man is up against, and how he was written by Diana.  John Bell is perfectly gawkward.  He too had just a moment on screen – and it seemed he universally struck the mark.
  5.  Brothel Breakfast of champions.  It was a great part of the book & we were all pretty happy that it made its way into the show.  Thanks for the tip.  That might be my favourite line.

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Another common thread

  1. Pure joy with all the things. There are definitely those in our group who love…all…the…things.  The joy of watching it come to life overwhelm their senses and the gushing goes forth.

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2.  Being underwhelmed.  Absolutely there were those that felt this way.  They       expected more & didn’t get that. The emotion simply wasn’t at the level they envisioned.                                                                                                                                      https://zenscribbles.files.wordpress.com/2014/08/bored-gif.gif

Both of these views, completely valid & easily understood.  We might not agree with the opposite perception of the scenes but it sure doesn’t make anyone mistaken.

Our group, as a whole, are pretty good with the separation of book & show.  Knowing that things change because of the need for translation, dropping things in now where their might be no time for the set up later.  The written word is rich and full whereas seeing something on screen becomes a little less dimensional. Do we miss things? Sure. Do we wish things were included? Sure. Do we find it ruins our overall enjoyment?  It sure doesnt seem like it.

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One thing we certainly all agree on.  It sure is nice to have J&C back together again.

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Don’t forget to play along with us as we Live Tweet with the Canadian airing of Outlander on W Network. Use #OutlanderCAN to keep up with us.

Sher.  Founder of the ABOotlanders

 

 

 

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Let’s talk about sex baby. “Surrender” was all about letting go!

I am sure if you have watched episode 2 of season 3 for Outlander you are quite aware there seemed to be as much sex in it as there was in season 2.  That should have topped ya all up.

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Do you think I am sexy baby? No? 

I get it…season 2 was NOT sexy.  Stillbirths, starvation, war….not foreplay in the making.  Season 3 however…the lovin’ was stong in “Surrender”

All the sex wasn’t shown, all the sex wasn’t with someone else or even completed but we are going to talk about it anyway. Why? Why focus on the sex? Because it was more than that…just like in real life.  The way two people communicate often involves their bodies. Whether it be with love, need, desire, anger or pure hatred.  Sex can be an expression of any of those.

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The first sex scene we were treated to was with Claire. Taking things into her own hands so to speak.  We know Claire is sexually advanced to societies expectation – which makes perfect sense concidering she was a woman who always pushed the boundaries in each time she existed in.  In this moment, fantasizing about the man she loves and pleasing herself seemed as natural as breathing.  Frank, asleep and oblivious was not as important to me. Part of me thought any hot blooded man, who hasn’t gotten some in a while, would recognize that heavy breath and pay very close attention.  In my mind, Frank did in fact wake…he just was super polite and just let her finish up.

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Fooled ya…

The second winka winka scene, brings us back to the Claire/Frank marriage bed.  This time, Claire looking a million miles away but still managing to reach out and poke him in the face to wake him up.  Ok…she brushed her fingers across his cheek.  He asks her “What is it.” She responds “I miss my husband.”  Which, lets be honest here, she isn’t lying.  She really misses her husband.  The red headed one, the one she dreams about. Frank will just ignore that for now. Cuz a man woken in the middle of the night with an invitation to the pleasure highway, generally will pay the assigned toll.

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Most of the time anyway

Claire sure wanted to scratch a lot of itches getting back to being who she used to be.  The third sex scene was anti- climactic.  Literally.

Claire does a little dance for Frank, removing her knickers (you couldn’t call those billowy things panties even if you wanted to), again, feeling the need to get out of what you know she feels mundane.  If she has to walk in these slippers, she wants them to have some heels. So she seduces Frank.  Who is totally into it, until he tries to connect with her emotionally.  The eyes are the windows to the soul and Claire has hers firmly SHUT.  He pleads with her to open her eyes and she basically ignores him, because she isn’t with him.

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How ’bout this Frank? Do you think I’m sexxxxxy???

She has a desire to escape and he is not heeding it by reminding her. Reality is, it is Frank she is having sex with not making love to Jamie. He stops. He has had enough.  It is one thing to have sex half asleep and ignore it but he is full on awake and totally gets it.

We notice when Claire gets SUPER angry when confronted with the truth.   She either throws ashtrays or she buggers off and seethes.  It is vastly different from the Claire who is motivated by her anger.  When she knows she is right, she turns that anger into action…when she is called on her shit she lashes out and shuts down.

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HURMPH!

Our fourth sex scene happens between a very broken man and a woman who simply wishes to be a balm in his life.  Also…she gets to have sex with Jamie, so there is that.  I heard a lot of people upset that we had to see Claire have sex with Frank but they didn’t make us “see” it with Jamie and Mary.  Here is my take.  You have already seen Frank and Claire have the sexy time in episode one, season one.  This isn’t a completely foriegn concept to us.  Jamie with anyone but Claire…going to take a bit more getting used to.

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Plus, I think after being in a cave for 6 yrs…he erupted after about 2 seconds…maybe….just maybe…he was a bit quick on the uptake and you DID see it all. The way I see it…watching Mary and Jamie have sex probably wouldn’t be so sexy.  I mean, they were both super skinny due to poor living conditions.  It might have been super distracting having two people that sounded like someone playing yatzee as opposed to having sex. Bones banging against one another – not so erotic eh?

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Nope…not even a little in the sexy department

This episode is the sexcircle of life.  Frank is Claire’s Jamie….Mary is Jamies Claire…round and round we go.

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Maybe we aren’t as connected in the sex circle…but you get my meaning.

Orgasm is an escape.  A surrender, so to speak.  It is a healthy way to treat the bodies wounds as it serves to be a bridge to the soul.

So have an orgasm today! Alone or with someone.  It is all good for you.

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Join us while we watch Outlander on Sundays via W Network! There is live tweet action and aftershow chat happening on the twitter., using the hashtag #OutlanderCAN

Sher

ABOotlander Founder

 

 

Sex & Intimacy. My version of O-Lander

Let me start with saying everyone is entitled to their opinion. I believe our opinions are just that. Our perceptions. We all have them and they will all be different. I do not expect nor want everyone to agree with me, however, respect my right to say what I perceive…as I respect all of yours. 

One of the biggest discussions in the world of Outlander this season was the sex…or there lack of.  Many say “We didn’t see the love.”  “We were robbed of what makes Jamie & Claire…Jamie & Claire.”  “The love would never last 20 yrs if they don’t connect!”

Believe it or not, I have made a living talking about sex & intimacy in life & relationships. That is what I want to do now.  Class is in session.

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Listen up!

Romantic relationships need TWO things to survive. Intimacy & Communication.  I didn’t say sex because sex is a product of these 2 categories.  Without intimacy, there likely will be no sex. Without communication, we likely won’t choose to have sex.

Let’s first keep in mind that Outlander the TV Show is that. The TV show, not a play by play of the book.  Conveying intimacy is something they can do in the show and it will turn out to have more meaning. The depth of talent that Sam Heughan and Caitriona Balfe have, means they are able to delve into that. Deeply.  Skin & sweating does not equal love & commitment. No matter how much we want to “see” it.

To reference being robbed, denied or missing something. These were never there in the first place.  What I mean by that is Outlander the TV Show has never existed before it did. 

But we read the books! Yes, I know, so did I…repeatedly.  This does not mean the TV show has been ‘built’.

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These are both dogs. Definitely NOT the same thing.  Outlander, the show & the books. Like these two puppies right here.

If the argument is “They gave us all the sex in season one and took it away in season two.” I do see your point. I would like to reference that season 2 was a different relationship, a different set of circumstances and frankly, a different show with the same title. It wasn’t a bait & switch, it was an evolution. The evolution of a marriage. Those of us blessed  enough to have found a deep love have likely experienced something similar ourselves. Change happens & it’s not always comfortable.

Season 1 was an exploration of a building romantic relationship, which is undeniable more passionate. That, for visual purposes, should be seen to some degree.  Each sex scene in Season 1 had a purpose. The wedding. Each scene was given in stages.  First newness/awkwardness, passion/exploration & then falling in love.  The scene in which they were having sex away from the group, distraction. The scene in which they have sex after the spanking scene, is not only forgiveness but also ferocity. 

Season 2 was a marriage. The people in the marriage had been through a huge trauma. Jamie’s rape along with the fight to keep him alive was one that could have easily broken a marriage apart. In the start of the season we saw that.  Sure, it might have been nice to see a little skin here and there, however, it wouldn’t have made a lot of sense.

Those who are dealing with a physical trauma such as the one portrayed in the show, more often than not, lack the desire a) to perform b) have someone THAT close. No matter how much you love & trust them.  It isn’t about the partner, it is about the victim and their ability to process.  When a sexual assault happens, very often the victim is loathe to put themselves back in that vulnerable position … especially when they are still emotionally coping with the trauma.

The beautiful thing we love about the visual exploration of these books should be the writers ability to see that the human experience will need to over rule the labido.  

What we saw a GREAT deal of in season two was intimacy.  I am not referring to the fade to black or the scene in the blue room. I am referring to the looks, touches and conversations/arguments that took place.  It is in these moments that our characters become the lovers that can not bare to lose one another.

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The ability to fight.  Jamie & Claire did that. Expressing anger can be quite a passionate act between partners.  It encourages us to say what is on our mind, it encourages us to not only say but show with emotion what our true feelings are.  An example is when Jamie was upset with Claire for working at L’Hôpital des Anges.  The argument was a conduit for deeper understanding which creates intimacy, which creates a deeper bond. Even when our partners say & do irrational things it causes us to think of the deeper issues. Disagreements tend to open lines of communication which in turn leads us to healthier relationships.

Another tragedy befalls Claire & Jamie.  It is the loss of a child.  Hurt, anger, pain -both physical & emotional will cause a rift in any relationship. What truly matters is the bridge back to one another and crossing it together. For when they do…it cements the relationship into something more permanent. Something that could span lifetimes.

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Loss + Forgiveness + Love = Solid Love Lessons

There was a WHOLE LOTTA story to tell in 13 episodes.  We need to speak of the actors commitment to their characters.  Caitriona Balfe & Sam Heughan have said they will not do gratuitous love scenes for the sake of them.  They understand they are telling a story and that the scenes, whether sexual or violent in nature will not be over done.  That is something I am personally grateful for.   It is when shows start throwing in ass shots for the sake of ass shots that they lose credibility.  Honestly, we know that Claire & Jamie are having sex.  Like any other married/loving couple…but we don’t have to see them do it to know they are. It’s like bathing…we really don’t have to see the act, the flies aren’t gathering so we get it.

Conveying the depth of their relationship is more important to the story than sexytime.  

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I would encourage folks to examine logistics of the end of the season as well.  Cold, hungry, weary and focused on changing the future.  Having sex for the sake of having sex isn’t exactly what any sane couple would do under the circumstances.  There is no doubt in my mind that they were, as their intimacy & connection showed greatly in those episodes, however, it was probably pretty un-sexy & the telling of that story was far more important.

The sex at the stones was much like the sex in the book. Fast…intense…and final. That kind of sex is never like a movie, its more like a punch in the stomach. Which I believe they captured perfectly.

I would love to end my view on the sexual world of Outlander. O-Lander if you please. Some of the most intense and intimate moments in books…don’t involve “sex” at all.   *cough* Get ready for the print shop folks. *cough* 

Too skip even further ahead to what I believe to be one of the most intimate scenes in all of Diana’s books…the final passage of  The Fiery Cross.

**Book Spoiler—if you haven’t read to this point in TFC, it is up to you to continue**

FYI-   Fun/Heartwarming Trivia —Diana Gabaldons husband is the one who uttered the final line of this particular passage. It is a testament of a well balanced marriage.  Translated to Claire & Jamie, we have watched the start of it & will continue to enjoy it.

“I sat down beside him, close, my hand on his leg, and his hand on mine. We sat thus for a bit, side by side, watching the rain clouds roll in over the river, like a threat of distant war.  And I thought that whether it was choice or no choice, it might be that it came to the same thing in the end.

   Jamie’s hand lay still on mine.  It tightened a little, and I glances at him, but his eyes were still fixed somewhere past the dooryard; past the mountains, and the distant clouds.  His grip tightened further, and I felt the edges of my ring press into my flesh.

   “When the day shall come, that we do part,” he said softly, and turned to look at me, “if my last words are not ‘I love you’–ye’ll ken it was because I dinna have time.”

2006

SherryLynn

@ABOotlanders Founder